Banned for not realising that my beard is host to various types of wildlife... not to mention the tasty remnants of repasts from yesteryear.

Banned for crumby commercials.

banned for commercializing the world

Banned for talking the talk and walking the walk in front of the mirror... gotta practise, I guess, but you oughta know that NASA cameras can see these strange happenings and post them on You Tube

Banned for tubing in a tub of suds.

banned for hunting suds in blue duds

Banned for being the dude in the duds with suds in his gruds.

[gruds being Aus slang for undies]

Banned for blaming it on Aussies. What'd they ever do to tubs full of sudsy gruds.

banned for being such a turd about it

Banned 'cause turds are made by vultures flying over the dessert.

Banned for not knowing that turds become bankers, politicians and advertising execs... car salespersons.

Banned for knowing trade secrets.

Banned for secretive trade with abovementioned undesirables.

banned for unfair evaluation of human excrement,  which contains useful quantities of nitrogen, potassium, phosphorous, and hydrocarbons.   comparisons to car salesman and bankers are completely unwarranted.

banned for attempting to make something useful