Banned because us rednecks know that what's ours is ours, and snowflake lefties best not try and take it.

Banned for being a redneck who keeps irregular hour while keeping what's ours and some of theirs

Also banned for being a redneck who thinks what's his is his and doesn't know that the taxman has taken a fair sized chunk of what's ours, theirs and everybody elses.

Banned 'cause this leftie did it left to right to frustrate the masses.

Banned for thinking what's right just left the building with right handed man who left his coat on the right side of the cloakroom, which is on the left side of the building right before you get the back door that sometimes hits you on the arse when you've left via the ground floor exit and turn right into Left Street.

Banned for confusing sides.

banned by the confucius party

Banned for Confucious say: "Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day."

He also say: "Pilot who flies plane upside down bound to have crack up.

And: "Man who goes with woman on bird watching expedition at nudist camp have good chance to see Great Tits."

Banned for aphorisms

banned for not seeing the hole in your pocket

Banned for doing an Alanis Morrissette, with one hand in your pocket.... but the other turning the pages of a girlie mag.

banned for using such mags

Banned for trying to evade your penance by blaming me for the girlie mags under your mattress.

banned for assuming that it was penance to service my lady just like the mags described that she caught me reading

Banned for plagiarizing. 

copying without permission. For shame

banned for breaking the editor